I Just Want To Eat

Workout date: 11/8/16

Tuesday night would have been an excellent time to take a rest day.  Over the previous two days, I had done that Brawl workout where I fell apart late and then I went as hard as I could during Fight Gone Bad.  I typically don't like to take rest days after only two consecutive days of working out (ok, let's be honest: I don't like taking rest days period), but in this case, I gave it some thought.  The WOD programmed for Tuesday evening was one that I probably wasn't going to be great at and I'm wonderful at wimping out when given the chance.  Here is what was on tap for Tuesday night:

12 minute AMRAP:
21 KB swings (53/35)
15 Toes-to-bar
9 Handstand push-ups

I am mediocre at best in each of those three movements and combining them together was not going to improve my abilities any.  And something told me that 12 minutes of that triplet was going to feel more like 24 minutes of work.  All the signs were pointing towards staying home on Tuesday and getting back after it on Wednesday.

But it was Dudes After Dark!  I'm not sure why I feel like I need to be there each week for this class, but I kinda feel like it's my baby and I need to nurture it.  The Dirty 9:30 used to be the noteworthy class at KOP.  Now the Noon Express and the 6am crew have their own followings.  Those classes are offered throughout the week though.  Dudes After Dark feels special because it happens once a week.  Everyone who attends knows it's gonna be extra sassy.  They know the coach will spend the first 15 minutes of class in the lobby.  They know that Cline is going to ask a good question.  It simply feels unique.  And since I named the class, I feel semi-obligated to be a regular attendee.

You know who doesn't feel that obligation?  LC.  We searched every inch of the lobby, but LC was nowhere to be found.  Coach Giulz would be running Dudes After Dark this week and she had an old-school sized class.  There were only 3 of us there for the 7:30 as Fight Gone Bad had likely caused many of the Dudes After Dark regulars to take the rest day that I had thought about taking.  Joining me in class were Neil and Actuary Mike.  Oh, I almost forgot.  There was one other attendee for our class that would have an unmistakable impact on it.  That attendee?  Kettlebell Kitchen.

We had received word that Kettlebell Kitchen would be at the gym on Monday giving out samples of their food, but they showed up a day later.  It is probably a good thing that they were not there during Fight Gone Bad.  The mental battle of getting through that workout is difficult enough without having to ignore the enticing smells of dinner over in the corner.  It was actually tough just getting through the warmup on Tuesday night with those scents wafting through the gym.  At one point, I looked at Giulz and let her know that I just wanted to eat instead of doing the workout.  The gentleman from Kettlebell Kitchen came up with a better offer.  He'd make the three of us doing the 7:30 class a to-go plate that we could enjoy post-workout.  Fine, I'll do the workout I signed up for.  But I am scarfing down that free food as soon as I get home!

Giulz walked us through what she expected from us in the workout.  On the KB swings, she wanted us to hold on for all 21 KB swings during each set.  That seemed ambitious.  Giulz claimed that she was not particularly good at KB swings, but she held on for all 21 swings when she did this workout earlier in the day.  Her pitch was that if she could do it, we could do it, even though it was going to suck.  At the toes-to-bar, Giulz explained that she wanted us to try and string reps, but that she didn't want us hanging on to the bar flailing about in an attempt to do multiple reps.  She would rather have us do singles with good form if we couldn't string reps properly.  Finally, when it came to the handstand push-ups, she wanted us to choose a scale that kept us moving through the workout.  She didn't want us getting stuck on something we were scaling.  If we could do something that involved getting upside-down, even better.  If not, we could do L-sit DB presses instead.

I was using the 53 pound KB for this workout, although I didn't have a lot of faith that I could string all 21 reps in later rounds of the WOD.  I was going to do toes-to-bar, with the expectation that it would be the element of the workout where I'd spend most of my time.  Finally, I was going with my standard scale of doing strict handstand push-ups with 2 abmats.  Most people had done 3-4 rounds in the 12 minute timeframe given for this WOD, so I set my sights on completing three rounds as my goal.  While this wasn't a workout filled with specialties of mine, I'd still be a little disappointed if I couldn't make 3 rounds happen.

Giulz reset the clock, told us to get ready, and then sent us on our way.  I'm pretty sure that all of us got through the first 21 KB swings without putting down our KBs.  That may have been ability.  Or it may have been fear, as I'm sure none of us wanted to be called out by Giulz for not holding on for the entirety of that first set.  From there, we moved on to the toes-to-bar.  I did a set of three reps correctly to begin.  On the next set, I only got two reps before my form fell apart.  If there is one movement at the gym that has gone from semi-strength to liability for me, it is toes-to-bar.  I used to practice this a lot and I could bust out a quality set of 10 in a row if need be.  Now?  I feel lucky when I can get that set of three.  I knew I was at the point where I was going to have to revert to singles if I wanted to keep decent form.  I did four of them before realizing that singles were not a good solution for me.  I was using a lot of energy jumping up to the high bar for each single rep.  And I felt like I was dropping from the bar unnecessarily even though my grip wasn't failing.  Against coach's orders, I decided to hang on going forward, doing larger sets even though I wasn't kipping between reps.  I would just do an extra swing before completing the next rep.  I could knock out sets of three that way.  After two sets like that, I could move on to the handstand push-ups.  Having done two sets of at least 9 consecutive handstand push-ups during JJ, I knew I should be able to handle that many in this workout.  I quickly did 9 reps and round one was finished.  Took close to 3 minutes.

I knew I wasn't going to be able to keep that pace up and finish 4 rounds.  Based on my toes-to-bar struggles, I was still concerned that 3 rounds might not happen.  I grabbed my KB and told myself that I had to get all 21 reps again.  I was slightly ahead of Neil and Mike after round one and after holding on for 21 more KB swings, I was the first one moving on to round two of toes-to-bar.  Again I resorted to the sets that Giulz told us not to do, but it was my only shot at completing three rounds.  My shoulders were fatiguing and I needed longer breaks between sets.  When I got through 15 reps of toes-to-bar, I needed another break to shake out my arms.  That first round of handstand push-ups wasn't that difficult, but I knew the second round would be a different story.  I got to 4 or 5 reps before I started to struggle.  I paused while upside-down against the wall, then continued on through the rest of the set.  The clock was nearing 7 minutes when I completed round two.

Round one: 3 minutes.  Round two: 4 minutes.  Round three: 5 minutes?  That seemed to be the logical conclusion and if that was the case, I needed to keep moving if I was going to finish three full rounds.  I was behind Mike when I started round three and I'd be behind Neil by the time we were finished with the KB swings.  That's because I couldn't string all 21 reps in round three.  Yes, Giulz was right in front of me when I put the KB down, but I figured if she was going to yell at me, she would have done it during my sloppy sets of toes-to-bar.  I broke up the 21 swings into sets of 12 and 9.

I had already lost time from my round 2 pace by breaking up the KB swings, so I attempted to make it up on the toes-to-bar.  I began with my usual set of 3, but on my second set, I held on for 5 reps.  Yes, I required a longer break after that set, but I held on for 4 reps in the next set.  That left me one more set of 3 that I got through after convincing myself that these would be the last 3 toes-to-bar that I'd have to do in the workout.  I moved on to the handstand push-ups, but my shoulders were burning and my arms felt weak as I attempted to go upside-down.  I was able to kick up on to the wall, but I had to come back down after 5 reps.  Giulz let us know there was one minute left as I was taking a break, so I was definitely finishing three rounds.  The question now was could I get through a fourth set of KB swings.

I kicked back up and took care of the last 4 handstand push-ups.  As I jogged back to my KB, I saw there was less than 45 seconds left.  I know every wall ball I do takes about 2 seconds on average, but I had it in my head that each KB swing takes that long as well.  If that math was correct, I had just enough time to get through 21 more swings, but I could not put the KB down.  I started swinging the KB with the thought in my head that I couldn't put it down until time was called.  The early swings must not have been very fast because I only had 10 done when Giulz let us know there was only 20 seconds left.  I picked up the pace (and the grunting) as I raced to finish the last 11 swings.  They were probably more like KB snatches than swings, but I was moving as quick as I could.  It was just fast enough, as I got the 21st swing overhead with 1 second to spare.  Final score: 3+21.

Both Mike and Neil were able to get back to the toes-to-bar for a fourth round, but I had a different destination in mind after completing my fourth round of KB swings.  I marched over to the Kettlebell Kitchen table and grabbed my plate of food.  I didn't eat it right then and there, but there was something about looking at what I'd be eating in about 10 minutes that was very comforting in that moment.

Wednesday preview: If people cared about finding a 14RM for the overhead squat, I would be king.  More frustration with my favorite lift.  And I discover during the cash out that I may have been overthinking this whole bar muscle-up thing.